What would Joe Namath do?

Shortly after Bernard Hopkins called Donovan McNabb out for his lack of ghetto hoodness blackness by saying:

“Forget this,” Hopkins said, pointing to his own dark skin. “He’s got a suntan. That’s all.”
“Why do you think McNabb felt he was betrayed? Because McNabb is the guy in the house, while everybody else is on the field. He’s the one who got the extra coat. The extra servings. ‘You’re our boy,’ ” Hopkins said, patting a reporter on the back in illustration. “He thought he was one of them.”
Replace “guy in the house” with “slave in the house,” then replace “on the field” with “in the field,” and Hopkins’ message is Uncle Tom-clear.

Donovan McNabb quickly fired back, defending his blackness even though he was raised by both parents in an upper-class Chicago suburb while attending private school:

“Ill-informed statements such as the perplexing one Mr. Hopkins muttered recently are dangerous and irresponsible.”

I just think it’s funny how McNabb issues a really white-sounding statement to defend his blackness. Should have said this:

How dis nigga be talkin’ shit is crazy. B-Hop finna get his ass whooped!

It would have been way more convincing.

Look at those guns.

When he’s not out smoking weed with his homies, Ray Rice likes to drink. And hit on girls. And then pick fights with boyfriends. And then scare boyfriends away.

A groupie who probably had sex with Rice and a few other NFL players source confided that….

[Ray's] His buddy Dylan let us into VIP. I guess he’s an artist that paints pictures or something? Whatever…all the athletes love him. We got in on everything. Anyways, Ray did a toast at the first bar we were in saying ‘fuck the lockout I am still rich as shit!’ as we did another shot of Patron on him..we were popping bottles at some club in West Palm, Ray Rice, Jacoby [Ford] and Tommie Harris were all there.

Later on in the night…

They got drunk as shit and were hollering at girls from their 7-series Beamer, a dude with one of the girls got pissed, so Ray got out of the car and when they saw how big Ray was he ran away.

Sounds pretty awesome to me. In order to confirm Ray Rice’s perceived bad-assness, I had to do some investigating.

First, why is Ray Rice friends with an artist named Dylan?

Turns out that Dylan is this guy. Makes sense because the website says he was doing art at the Anquan Boldin charity event earlier in April (when all this fun lockout debauchery when down).

Check out Ray Ray signing a portrait of his at the event:

I asked this source to see if there was any pictures of the drunk fun (or the weed smoking the day before), but this photo of Ray Rice threatening the camera man not to take a picture was only made available to me:

Same outfit as earlier in the day, Ray Ray? Does Ray Ray not believe in t-shirt time?

Free shots of Patron for everyone, still being rich as shit even though there’s a lockout, bangin’ groupies and scaring people with your massive guns. Yeah…Ray Rice is a fucking bad ass.

The NFL lockout was lifted Monday by Judge Susan Richard, which means that players have to abide by the NFL’s rules and personal conduct policy again. During the lockout, players weren’t subject to any NFL rules regarding personal conduct, drugs and steroids so you know players were taking advantage of that. Actually, I do know that players were taking advantage. I’ve heard tales from agents, friends and groupies…and now you get to hear. Anyways, here’s a fun tale:

Ravens wide receiver Anquan Boldin sponsored a charity basketball tournament last week attended by a bunch of big-name football players that reside in South Florida. One of the attendees was his former teammate, Arizona Cardinals cornerback Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie.

Gotta love millionaire athletes posing shirtless in front of a gas station showing off their chain that they spent their entire signing bonus on those glasses!

DRC, who reportedly wowed the crowd at the charity event by getting high on the court with his dunks, also wowed his NFL buddies by getting everyone high on some devil’s lettuce.

After a conversation with a witness, I found out that…ah well, here’s what I was told:

On Thursday we got high as fuck.. Me, DRC, Jacoby Ford, Ray (Rice), (David) Clowney, other guys. Apparently Thursday was Ray’s first time smoking weed ever….courtesy of DRC. Dude pulled out this big fucking bag of some dank shit.

What a bad influence he is…I wouldn’t expect any less of Antonio Cromartie’s cousin. At least he’s not stingy.

DRC has never tested positive for marijuana or any drug (neither has Ford, Rice or Clowney). What’s your secret, DRC?

________

More tales of the NFL lockout to come tomorrow…

Really Sanchez? FUCK

A Deadspin article came out today insinuating that Mark Sanchez had a relationship with hot underaged assa 17-year-old MINOR, and that the girl had pictures of being in his room.

Well, the girl lawyered up. Both the girl and her attorney deny having any type of illegal relationship with Sanchez. Deadspin will leak more details on Tuesday.

They’re probably just stirring shit. Deadspin seems to hate Sanchez for no apparent reason is right ALL THE TIME. Or maybe I’m just a delusional Jets fan who doesn’t want to believe Sanchez is a pedo.

Wonder if the Jets/NFL will to look into this.

(Haha, see what I did there with the headline?)

In case if you didn’t know about Rex Ryan and his wife Michelle’s whole foot-fetish video “scandal”, read this on Deadspin.

I sort of feel bad for Rex Ryan, because we all know that I’m a delusional Jets fan and I just stick up for anyone who plays or coaches for the Jets besides the embarrassment caused to himself and his family, no harm was done to anyone.  Unless, of course, my team fucking blows their playoff chances because of this the Jets take this foot-fetish media circus as a distraction.

Anyways, Christmas at the Ryan house is probably going to be really awkward.  I’m sure this whole situation answered many questions from their two sons, who are now teenagers.

“So that’s why mom and dad like to put up so many Christmas stockings….”

This holiday season, Rex and Michelle Ryan are giving a whole new meaning to “stocking stuffers”.  Hey-o!